Date: 7th August 2012 at 2:23pm
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Villa statement just in case you miss it on the official site:

Supporters are advised that the Villa Store at Villa Village will be closed on Sunday.

The store will be closed throughout the day as Villa Park is hosting the Community Shield clash between Chelsea and Manchester City.

It will reopen as normal on Monday August 13.


So, reading between the lines, like some do… Randy is 100% selling, Paul Lambert won’t glow in the dark, we are signing 22 £30m players by next neverday, Jean Makoun is in fact a French secret agent which is why he hasn’t joined the squad yet, Bodymoor is the training ground for the ACL (anti cheese league) and our CEO was brought in with the agenda to make us all eat locally sourced organic food.

There, it’s now in print on the internet, so it must be true.

I mean, ‘it will reopen on Monday’… will it? Do we have any proof of this? ;o)

Trust me, I’ve an impeccable source.

 

16 Replies to “Club Shop Closed Sunday – Surely A Conspiracy”

  • anyone else got any itk bull, sorry, I mean itk facts? I’ve heard that Stephen Ireland is actually Welsh and that Randy is going to rename us Aston McDonalds

  • LOL Nah Fear matei think youv’e pretty much covered all the itk’s angles here LOL quality!

  • IF Makoun is a French secret agent, surely he’d be in the Foreig Legion by now?……… Lol

  • I luv this article, its about what has started to grind my gears about some itk’s or so they claim in this world, as soon as some folk see us Villans happy and looking forward to the season apposed to recent seasons gone by they can’t wait to try and put a spanner in the works, we know we aint got silly money to buy a trophy but thats not why we chose this great club to support otherwise we would be supporting other teams glory hunting, nah we are looking forard to seeing our team play some football on the ground and try and win games rather than roll over for the opposition before a balls kicked and thats why we are happy to have Mr Lambert and an owner who has not risked our financial future on instant success so there thats my piece said lol UTV!

  • I’m sure a AV news and views (or whatever it’s called) will soon let us know the real reason behind this shop closing story. I mean, shop closing, as if. I think it must be Makoun behind this, maybe he’s turning the shop into his house!!!

  • I happen to know that we won the European Cup when only Champions were allowed to enter. Apparently If you live outside of Brum nobody knows that and in fact only Chelski have ever bought, sorry I mean won, Europes top competition.

  • I don’t believe a word! Randy out! Bent out – selfish one touch goal hanger! Aussies out – I hate Jason Donovan! Irish put – I hate Guiness!

  • So…shop closes..News and Views have nothing about this yet, or how its going to affect our ability to play football, or how its all Lerners fault and the club is on a downward spiral…wait for the day they realise Bovrils gone up by 10p….woe is me..oh woe is me!

  • Surely we should make Hutton & Warnock stand in the window with a big for sale sign. Maybe even free to a good home! You never know City or Chelsea may want them

  • I suppose you have to know sooner or later, so why not now? The shop is closed so that the stock can be cleared to make way for new merchandise and kit for the new club Aston Villa Chust, in the new colours of red and sky-blue, which will be unveiled early next week. Fed-up with his treatment at Arsenal, billionaire Alisher Usmanov has sold his Arsenal holding and is to buy Aston Villa outright, and will use his $18bn fortune to turn Villa into a world football superpower. The kit will be changed to the same colours as the Uzbek Republic’s flag, and the ground will be renamed the Uzbek Stadium. As a gesture to the fans ticket prices will drop by half and every fan will get a free taxi home, when it rains. But don’t tell anyone I told you.

  • Cheese wedge? And my sauce (ketchup) has informed me that we are going to be called the Birmingham Browns, and will have a new club crest (turds rampant, either side of the bullring) and a new strip produced by George of Asda.

  • My brother’s girfriends younger brother’s friend saw the shop assistant talking to the manager of Kwiksave Sutton Coldfield. Rumour is there is a deal on the table. This is the real reason the shop isn’t opening.

  • Cheese is the devils food, if that is what Villa are now up to, it will end in tears, believe me.

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