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@VillasHerc in the Dressing Room Before Chelsea

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*We join the lads gearing up for their match against Chelsea. Lambert arrives in full costume carrying a huge sack of presents*

Lambert: Ho! Ho! Hooooo! Meeeeerry Christmas!

*A few of the lads recoil in horror, some just look on confused or shocked. Lambert removes his mask and flicks his horns.*

Lambert: Uh…. Yeah sorry about that lads, there appears to have been a spelling error in the costume order, didn’t want you to think I’d not made the effort at all though.

*A few of the more scared lads sigh with relief.*

Bent: What’s in the bag boss?

Lambert: Presents for the team of course, a thank you for all your hard work as of late. So first…..

*Lambert roots around in the large sack of gifts,he pulls out the first and reads the label*

Lambert: Christian!

*Benteke strides forward smiling widely, he takes the gift and unwraps it.*

Benteke: ….. A fireman’s hat and suit?

Lambert: Yes Christian. Just a reminder, ‘you can be whatever you want to be’

Benteke: Thanks boss!

Lambert: No problem.

*They hug, Bent rolls his eyes*

Bent: …and the next present?….

Lambert: Right, right let’s move on!

*Lambert again dips into the bag and reveals another present, he fumbles around looking for it’s tag*

Lambert: And it’s for…….Christian!

*Benteke again gratefully accepts the present*

Benteke: A police officer uniform! Oh I see!

*The gifts continue on and on each a different occupational uniform for Benteke until he is handed the final gift from the sack. Bannan, Albrighton, Lichaj and Westwood by this time are dancing ‘YMCA’ in baggy outfits*

Bent: SO they’re all for Christian!? What about the rest of the team?!

Lambert (nervously): I have things for the rest of the team…

Bent: Yeah!? Where then?

*Lambert scans the room and spots something on the desk*

Lambert: Um… Nathan, I got you this!

Baker: Wow! A hole puch! Awesome!

Bent: What!? You just picked that up! It has ‘PROPERTY OF CHELSEA F.C’ stamped on it!

Lambert: Nonsense Darren… Um … Here guys I got you these….

Bannan: Cool! Adidas training vests!

Albrighton: How did you KNOW boss?

Lichaj: Hey look at me! I’m sponsored by Samsung!

Bent: You’re just giving out stuff lying around the dressing room boss! This is ridiculous I …. Aaargh!

*Bent lets out a high pitched yelp at a figure standing at the door, Delph steps in*

Delph: Sorry I’m late guys I got a little held up. I…..

*Delph stops and looks Lambert up and down, then at himself*

Delph: Well. This is awkward. Perhaps one of us should change.

Lambert: Oh Fabian, did you make a spelling error hiring your Santa costume too?

Delph: Hiring? I own this, every match I visit the opposition ‘Hell’s here!’, ‘Prepare to meet your doom!’ Y’know that kinda stuff.

Lambert: Oh….. Well can you stop that please.

Delph: I doubt it.


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