Date: 1st September 2012 at 6:40pm
Written by:

As well as (failing in attempts at) writing witty, popular articles for Vital that everyone will love, I occasionally dabble in poetry. For you, the Vital audience, I put forward this effort regarding our actions in this crazy transfer window. Enjoy!

Good riddance McLeish, in Lambert we trust
New players we need and sign them you must
Ditch all the dead wood and bring some fresh blood
Or we`ll definitely go down this time, with a thud
So pesky was Heskey but now he is gone
Adios to King Carlos, forever the one
Sorry James Collins, your tackles got rasher
Ever since you got chucked out of Gatecrasher
The wage bill`s been trimmed, now who do we sign?
I have to say Messi`s a favourite of mine
But we trust your judgement, go build us a team
Make us flash like TOWIE, but don`t sign Tim Ream
Signed by McLeish, he seems like an oldman
But we still need to see the skills of Brett Holman
So who`s he brought in? Hutton`s boat won`t be floatin`
Hot on his heels is the boy Matt Lowton
Dunne will be shaking in his Wonderbra
With the competition he`s got in Ron Vlaar
The opposition will play like Laurel and Hardy
When they run into Karim el Ahmadi
Our lads will play the same way the best would
Backed up by a lad called Ashley Westwood
English prospect from the Middlesbrough senate
No relation to Gordon, we have Joe Bennett
And finally, Henke went to Genk on a ‘recci
Then we huffed, puffed and landed Benteke
Not a bad window`s business, I think you`ll agree
Unproven, lower league but hungry for AV
A little disgruntled by the actions of Dempsey
But Spurs love a flake, so I say let them see
In the meantime the Fonz has gone out on loan
Let`s hope he comes back like a dog with a bone
But we`ve got a whole season til judgement is passed
On Lambert`s new Villa; built to last.